The Real Life of a Ministry Mum

Jules Middleton is one of hundreds of mums in ministry across the Church today, and yet against a predominantly white, middle-class, male-dominated history, they can still be something of an anomaly. In her upcoming book Breaking the Mould she brings together stories of ministry mums from all different walks of life. From Pentecostal to Methodist, single mums to adopters, RAF chaplains to disability advisors and everything in-between – Jules maps the highs and lows ministry mums may face as they seek to ‘break the mould’ and challenge the ‘shoulds’ and stereotypes that surround both roles. In this second part of our Q&A with her she tells us who inspires her and what advice she would give to parents on their call to ministry.

3. Apart from the ministry mums mentioned in the book, who else inspires you and why?

Gosh, so many people! Greta Thunberg for her passion and courage, Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez for standing up for what she believes in and fighting the system, The Pope and his example of Godly compassion and kindness, Priscilla Shirer makes me want to preach like a boss, Caroline Criado Perez inspires me to smash the patriarchy, Tom Wright - just because I’m jealous of his brain, Nadia Bolz-Weber being unashamedly herself and challenging the church makes me want to be less afraid to do so, Pete Greig inspires me to pray more, bigger, bolder… I read a lot so am often inspired by the stories I read of others living out their faith especially in difficult circumstances. And it’s not just those that I read about either, I love hearing people’s stories and one amazing thing about ministry is meeting so many people and having that opportunity to be inspired by them. One of my favourite people to pray with is a 90+ year old woman at church who despite various ailments is still so on fire for God, she inspires me to just keep focussing on Jesus with all my heart.


4. What one piece of advice would you give to parents who have a call to ministry?

Learn to like gin?

Seriously, God calls us to be parents as much as ministers and I really don’t think that God wants us to sacrifice our families on the altar of ministry. So remember there is no one size fits all for ministry - find out what works for you and your family, stick to it and don’t feel guilty about it. (And just to add that might change at different stages of life so keep an eye on when your carefully balanced juggle might need to be tweaked!)

5. Finally, is this book just for parents in ministry or will it appeal to parents working in other spheres?

Yes definitely, I think the book has a wider appeal in many ways. I mean it might just be from a curiosity point of view! Even though there are quite a few of us ministry mums, people often seem to find us super interesting or unusual, so here’s their chance to delve into the real life of a vicar who’s a mum and see what it's like, warts and all! But more than that, many of the challenges that we ministry mums face I am sure will strike a chord with other working parents too - mums and dads - vicars don’t have a monopoly on the difficulty of family and work balance!

Jules is one of hundreds of mums in ministry across the Church today, and yet against a predominantly white, middle-class, male-dominated history, they can still be something of an anomaly. Bringing together stories from all different walks of life - Pentecostal to Methodist, single mums to adopters, RAF chaplains to disability advisors and everything in-between – Jules maps the highs and lows ministry mums may face as they seek to ‘break the mould’ and challenge the ‘shoulds’ and stereotypes that surround both roles.

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